I Don't Care
by N.P. Windsnap
Summary: A list of everything that Sherlock doesn't care about, or, the things that hurt too much or say.


I don't care what anyone has to say. I don't care that the girl laugh when I asked her out. I don't care that someone is calling me faggot. I don't care that they all laugh at me because of my good grades. I don't care that everyone calls me freak. I don't care that Mycroft won't play deduction with me anymore. I don't care that mummy has left. I don't care that daddy has too. I don't care that I have to keep a skull or company. I don't care that they put Red Beard down. I don't care that they called me cripple when I broke my leg. I don't care that Mycroft called me stupid. I don't care that no one cares about me. I don't care that my life is falling apart. I don't care that my violin teacher was just murdered. I don't care that I held his hand while he died. I don't care that I have no friends. I don't care that no one asked me how my day was. I don't care that I have to cover the scars. I don't care that the razor is old and rusty. I don't care that Mycroft had to take me to the hospital. I don't care that he yelled at me. I don't care that I almost died. i don't care that the voices won't stop in my head. I don't care that the voices tell me that I'm a bad person. I don't care that it's only one voice. I don't care that the voice is mine. I don't care that I live in a mental ward. I don't care that the voice says I'm crazy. I don't care that Mycroft doesn't visit. I don't care that mummy came only to insult me. I don't care that everyone thinks that I killed my nurse. I don't care that no one believed me, even when I proved it. I don't care that the police officer named Greg believes me. I don't care that Mycroft got me out. I don't care that I spent my eighteenth birthday alone. I don't care that I'm addicted to cocaine. I don't care that Mycroft calls me a junkie. I don't care about what those men did to me in that alley. I don't care that the police officer named Greg took me home and made me tea. I don't care that he is my only friend. I don't care that Gre- Lestrade said that I should be a detective. I don't care that he took my cocaine. I don't care that the voice is back. I don't care that I can see everything and that I can't stop noticing. I don't care that I drove my car into a semi. I don't care that Mycroft didn't yell at me this time. I don't care that the police officer named Donovan calls me freak. I don't care that I take it out on Anderson. I don't care that my only friends are my landlady and my supervising officer. I don't care that I started smoking. I don't care that I can't breathe. I don't care that Mrs. Hudson found my on the ground, trying to get air. I don't care that Mycroft didn't yell this time either. I don't care that I've become a detective. I don't care that I'm helping people. I don't care that people thank me. I don't care that I met John who served in Afghanistan and not Iraq. I don't care that I put a chair in the flat for him. I don't care that he saved my life. I don't care that he helps me with my cases. I don't care that he got a job and left me alone at the flat all day. I don't care that I found the cigarettes and started smoking. I don't care about the look that John gave me. I don't care that I was beaten. I don't care that Moriarty has a bomb strapped to John. I don't care that I had to let Moriarty go. I don't care that John is alive and safe. I don't care that he watches Pirates of the Caribbean with me when he catches me crying. I don't care that he catches me crying. I don't care that Moriarty is going to kill them. I don't care that I have to jump. I don't care that John isn't with me. I don't care that Mycroft let them beat me. I don't care that John broke my nose when I came back. I don't care that he has a life outside of me. I don't care that he moved on. I don't care that I like Marry. I don't care that they've gotten married. I don't care that I'm alone in the flat again. I don't care that I moved John's chair so that I didn't have to see how empty it was. I don't care that Mary shot me. I don't care that I have to tell John. I don't care that she saved my life. I don't care that Magnussen is threatening Marry. I don't care that I matter to Mycroft. I don't care that Mummy caught us smoking and Mycroft covered for us both. I don't care that I shot Manussen in the head. I don't care that Mycroft is sending me away from everyone that I love. I don't care that he's back. I don't care that John, Mary, and their little girl are in danger. I don't care that I promised to always be there for them. I don't care that I've found my pressure point. I just don't care any more.


End file.
